Seattle is full of phags... : Yamaha R6 : R6 Forum

» Insurance
» Sponsors
» Yamaha YZF R6 Prices
Go Back   Yamaha R6 Forum: YZF-R6 Forums > R6 Community Topics > Off Topic Talk

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 11-30-2012, 09:54 AM   #1
MaxxxEdge
Incredible M@xxxhole
 
MaxxxEdge's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: In front of you... ;)
Posts: 52,014
Bike: Pasta & Rice
Seattle is full of phags...

...so I'm making a trip there... but not for reasons you think ... see below:

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sea/561877622.html
__________________
"Always be yourself... unless you suck." -- Joss Whedon

"Anal is just like riding a bicycle... Except without the seat." -Mark Spiegler

If you don't hang your balls out there and just do it, you'll never know what might have happened... -- Valentino Rossi

Unlike one made of concrete, the wall of adversity will eventually fall when we exert enough pressure. -- Max Edge

"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." -- Dr. Seuss

Dream as if you'll live forever. Live as if you'll die today. -- James Dean


sig courtesy of the mega-talented dboyslade
MaxxxEdge is offline   Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Old 11-30-2012, 10:08 AM   #2
R-Silaxin
Track=Cocaine
 
R-Silaxin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: El Paso, TX
Posts: 13,524
Bike: 06 R-6 Deathraven
Re: Seattle is full of phags...



AWESOME! Is it weird I got a lil chubby reading this? Sounds like the perfect hook up... Who are these pussies up in Seattle? Get the job DONE!

Nice find Max!
__________________
RIP Richard Bishop. You're a great friend and someone I will never forget.
MY TRACK BUILD THREAD http://www.r6-forum.com/forums/showt...05#post2428805
MY TRACK DAY THREADhttp://www.r6-forum.com/forums/showt...655&highlight=
MY YOUTUBE CHANNEL https://www.youtube.com/user/adam2cox
MY FACEBOOK http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?...79&ref=tn_tnmn


MY XBL GAMERTAG: AmericanGingers
R-Silaxin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-30-2012, 10:20 AM   #3
Agg2001
Original Member-Vendor

 
Agg2001's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: www.AggRacing.com, TX-USA
Posts: 29,963
Bike: 2007 R6, 2005 CRF250r
Send a message via AIM to Agg2001 Send a message via MSN to Agg2001 Send a message via Yahoo to Agg2001
Re: Seattle is full of phags...

PRINTED. awesome.
__________________


High-end, AFFORDABLE, parts and accessories for your bike!

ALWAYS free shipping to the USA, with 1-3 day delivery times.


Agg2001 is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 11-30-2012, 10:22 AM   #4
TheJokester3
A work in progress...
 
TheJokester3's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: Colorado
Posts: 13,256
Bike: 07 Candy Red R6
Re: Seattle is full of phags...

Quote:
Dear Men of Craigslist,

Look, I know you men have it difficult. Women are just about impossible to understand, much less please. In a post-feminist society, you never know exactly what you should be doing. Women are bloody picky, I know we are. It can be scary, too, when women freak out about what appear to be benign issues. And men who do their best to be respectful, female-positive humans, I salute you, I do.

But please, please just **** me already. Honestly, I appreciate your thoughtfulness. I like that you want to take things slow. I can totally get behind the idea of emotional connection, but dearjesusinheaven, **** ME. We've done dinner and drinks. We've gone dancing. We've cuddled and watched a movie. I'm wearing a low cut shirt and you've been staring at my breasts all night. Goodgodalmighty, get to it and **** me.

When we get hot and heavy, please take charge. Please, please **** me. Trust me, I'm not going to just lie still - I'll get involved. But don't make me force your hand into my panties. That makes me feel like a rapist. We've been kissing for a half hour and your hand keeps grazing my ass. That's nice, but it's time to move forward. Get on top of me. Don't make me get on top right out of the gate and start bobbing up and down on your cock like I'm practicing some crazy new aerobic yoga because YOU won't go down on me. Roll on top and start dry humping like a good boy should. Don't gently suck my nipples and then pull back when I moan with pleasure. You being coy is totally not what I want. It's not what WE want.

OK, I know it's scary. There are lots of women out there who make ****ing really difficult. So, I have compiled some handy tips. Don't think of this as complaining, or as schadenfreude for the Andrea Dworkins of the world. Just some simple tips, for timid men who have forgotten what it means to **** like men:

1. Taking charge is not bad. Oh, there will be some women who feel that you are pushy. If you are making out with a woman, and she starts to push back, ask nicely if things are moving too fast. If she says yes, say something like "I'm sorry - you just look so ****ing delicious. I'll go slower." Otherwise, skillfully move forward. If you start kissing a woman, and she responds well, and before long, you're both on the floor with her skirt pushed up, and you on top of her, it's not the time to roll onto your back and start awkwardly stroking the top of her head. Seriously, grow a goddamn pair. YOU'RE the man. Act like one.

2. Ohmy****inggod, please learn to respect the clit. It's different for every woman, so ask what she likes. Do not, I repeat, do not just wiggle your fingers around her pussy like you're trying to tickle her. Do not drum your fingertips against her vulva like you are impatiently waiting at the Sears Tire Center for your receipt. Do not push the clit like it is a doorbell at some house that you need to get inside of. Start by using all four fingers with firm yet gentle pressure against the outside of her pussy. Do not charge in with a single finger and start jabbing at things. And if you really don't know what to do, ask her. Just ask. "How do you like it?". It's a simple question, and most women will answer straight out. If she's being all coy, ask "Do you like pressure? Is it sensitive?" The clitoris is a varied item, indeed. Treat each one as though you have never encountered one before. Forget everything that your last partner liked.

3. Most women like to be ****ed, and ****ed well. Yes, there are women out there who want to "make love" every time - sweet, gentle, rocking love with lots of eye contact and loving kisses. Those women are not the majority. The majority like to be pounded. The majority like to have their hair pulled. The majority like a good, solid jackhammering. When a woman is bucking wildly against you, it's not because she wants you to pull back and slowly swirl your cock around her vagina like you're mixing a cake batter up there. It's because she wants you to hold down her arms, or grab her hips, or push her legs above her head, and **** her harder. Don't be too afraid of what this means as far as gender equality goes - I am a raging feminist bitch, but I still want to be penetrated like you are planning on ****ing my throat from the inside out.

4. A little roughness is nice. Do not pretend that you had no idea that some women like their hair pulled. Do not act shocked if she wants you to spank her ("Really? Spanking? Won't it hurt?" - yes, it does. That's the ****ing point). We know you've read Stuff and Maxim, and that's all those laddie mags talk about in their "How to Please Her" sections. Start with light, full handed smacks to the area of her ass that she sits on. Judge her response and continue on from there. You don't have to bend her over one knee and tell her she's a naughty girl and that Daddy's going to punish her; save that for the fifth date. Women are less delicate than you think, so don't worry about breaking her hip.

5. It's OK for you to make noise. Otherwise, we feel like we are ****ing a ninja. Unless you actually are a ninja, and have sneaked into our rooms with vibrating nanuchaku and zippered black pajamas, please, please make some noise. If you're banging a woman, and she's crying out and saying your name and moaning, and you can't even manage a grunt, she's going to feel like an idiot. You don't have to make the sounds she is making, but do SOMETHING. You know how when you are watching porn, and the girl does something great to the guy and the guy kind of goes "Ah!", half grunt, half yell? That's HOT. Do that. Whisper our name (assuming you know it) gruffly. Groan against her neck when you're in missionary position. You don't have to grunt like a mountain gorilla, but if you are totally mute, she's going to get worried.

6. Most women like dirty talk, in addition to the grunting. If you'd like to get some dirty talk going, ask her if she likes the way you **** her. If she responds well, continue with something like, "I love ****ing you. God, you look so ****ing hot." Is she still moaning in response? "Your tits are so beautiful." Does that work? If she doesn't respond well to the term "tits", you might have to stop there. If she keep moaning or responding, pass Go and collect $200. Try the following:

"Oh, god. Your pussy is SO tight."
"You're so wet - are you wet because you like the feel of my cock ramming you?"
"I think I'm going to come inside you. I'm going to fill up your little cunt." It doesn't matter that you're wearing a condom; we LOVE hearing this.

If all of those work, you can then progress to things like "sexy little bitch" and "dirty whore". Tread carefully, but please, tread. Do not tiptoe. Do not sit down. Charge.

6. You're not obligated to eat a woman out. In return, she's not obligated to choke on your dick. Don't skip one and expect the other. If you do eat a woman out, the only comment you should make about her pussy is how nice it is. The length of her labia minora, the color of her interior, her waxing job or full bush - you are not John Madden. No time for color commentary.

7. Do not bitch about condoms. Oh, we hate them. Trust us. They hurt us more than they hurt you. But we don't want to be preggers, and you don't want to catch anything, right? Don't whine about condom sex. Do not explain that you can't come with one on. LEARN to come with one on, or if not, help us figure out what to do with you once we're satisfied and it's time for you to let loose your load.

8. We really like it when you come. It's called a money shot for a reason. Watching semen shoot out of you is one of the most gratifying things EVER. However, do not assume that she wants you to jack it off onto her face. She might, but don't assume. Seeing and/or feeling you come is rewarding for us, so there's no need to deprive us of it, but please do consult us before unleashing. "I think I'm going to come - how do you like it?" is a fair question that shouldn't rob you of your testicles.

In recent memory, I've been ****ed by a very aggressive, manly guy, and I've been... well, ****ed is the wrong term here. I've been penetrated by a total and utter wuss. Who am I going to run back to when I'm ready for my fill? Manly McHardon, that's who. ----------------------------------------------------

*New point of clarification - some people have brought up some really great issues in response to this post, so let me say this: I don't mean to imply that all women like to be treated like whores. I do mean to say that most women I know have told me that they like sex rougher than most men give it to them. Rough does NOT equal chains and bondage. And this applies to the bedroom only, and does not mean that she wants you to choose her dinner for her, or treat her like less of a person. **Some women have said that they don't like it rough and what the hell am I thinking? Well, girls, you're in the minority. HOWEVER, all women need to remember that, in addition to be straight forward about your sexual desires, you need to be straight forward about your sexual limits. Don't be afraid to ask for more, but when something feels wrong, say so. Don't ever do something you don't want to do in silence and then blame the guy. Silence is dangerous.
So we don't lose the ad.
__________________
RIP Matt (Ghost R6). You will be greatly missed. Be smooth and the rubber turning till we meet again.


Quote:
Originally Posted by ak2007r6 View Post
"I refuse to tip toe through life to arrive safely at deaths door".
Quote:
Originally Posted by thedub View Post
There is more to squidliness than just your gear.
Build Thread
TheJokester3 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-30-2012, 10:24 AM   #5
aleithauser
Speedy Claxton
 
aleithauser's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Grand Rapids, MI
Posts: 1,765
Bike: '07 R6
Send a message via AIM to aleithauser
Re: Seattle is full of phags...

That is so incredibly true. Any girl that says otherwise is lying to your face.
aleithauser is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-30-2012, 10:31 AM   #6
R-Silaxin
Track=Cocaine
 
R-Silaxin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: El Paso, TX
Posts: 13,524
Bike: 06 R-6 Deathraven
Re: Seattle is full of phags...

Quote:
Originally Posted by aleithauser View Post
That is so incredibly true. Any girl that says otherwise is lying to your face.
True for the majority... Not every girl...
__________________
RIP Richard Bishop. You're a great friend and someone I will never forget.
MY TRACK BUILD THREAD http://www.r6-forum.com/forums/showt...05#post2428805
MY TRACK DAY THREADhttp://www.r6-forum.com/forums/showt...655&highlight=
MY YOUTUBE CHANNEL https://www.youtube.com/user/adam2cox
MY FACEBOOK http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?...79&ref=tn_tnmn


MY XBL GAMERTAG: AmericanGingers
R-Silaxin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-30-2012, 10:35 AM   #7
aleithauser
Speedy Claxton
 
aleithauser's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Grand Rapids, MI
Posts: 1,765
Bike: '07 R6
Send a message via AIM to aleithauser
Re: Seattle is full of phags...

Quote:
Originally Posted by R-Silaxin View Post
True for the majority... Not every girl...
Then their lying to themselves

Thats what I meant though, the majority of em.
aleithauser is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-30-2012, 10:47 AM   #8
daisbest
* * * Punisher * * *
 
daisbest's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: hudson, wisconsin
Posts: 1,250
Bike: 2005 raven R6
Re: Seattle is full of phags...

Trololol
__________________
MODS:
* Roth industries smog block offs
* Zero gravity smoked DB
* Shermoto shorty levers
* Scotts steering damper
* 06 shorty muffler conv.
* 520 chain conv. -1/+2
* Factory pro +4 rotor
* BMC race filter
* Dunlop Q2's
* Dynojet Pc3
* 12k h.i.d kit

daisbest is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-30-2012, 10:54 AM   #9
Tribalic One
This is bat country!
 
Tribalic One's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Conway, AR
Posts: 1,870
Bike: 2005 white/red R6
Re: Seattle is full of phags...

Great read! Seattle is doing it wrong.
Tribalic One is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-30-2012, 10:56 AM   #10
m3lover1
Lead3r of the Triads
 
m3lover1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: On top of Rainbows
Posts: 25,902
Bike: Two dirty dirty bikes
Re: Seattle is full of phags...

Holy shit that was funny!
__________________


Proud winner of April 2013 ROTM with a bike that no one likes!

I <3 PASSION MOTORSPORTS

Street/Track Build

Quote:
Originally Posted by redisdeadrideblue View Post
Ive taken bigger shits than Ricky, but he has personality, so that should count for something......right?
Quote:
Originally Posted by babymilo36 View Post
I see my balls are in high demand in terms of cupping
RIP Jason (Snocompton). We will miss you.
m3lover1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
New guy from Seattle, WA.... JFATS New Member Section 6 02-08-2012 08:39 AM
Hello From Seattle, WA. AHCHIU New Member Section 3 03-28-2009 08:26 PM
New one from Seattle DJ Nathan V New Member Section 9 07-20-2008 05:07 PM
Anyone from Seattle, WA (Near UW)? StockR6 North West 1 11-08-2007 09:58 PM
seattle 100 blur North West 1 07-10-2007 04:36 PM

Powered by vBadvanced CMPS v3.2.2

All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:40 PM.



Powered by vBulletin® Copyright ©2000 - 2014, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Motorcycle News, Videos and Reviews
Honda Grom Forum Harley Davidson Forum Honda 600RR Kawasaki Forum Yamaha R6 Forum Yamaha FZ-09 Forum
1199 Panigale Forum Roadglide Forum Honda CBR1000 Forum Vulcan Forum Yamaha R1 Forum Yamaha R3 Forum
Ducati Monster Forum Harley Forums Honda CBR250R Forum ZX10R Forum Star Raider Forum Yamaha Viking Forum
Suzuki GSXR Forum V-Rod Forums Honda Shadow Forum Kawasaki Motorcycle Forum Star Warrior Forum KTM Duke 390 Forum
SV650 Forum BMW S1000RR Forum Honda Fury Forum Kawasaki Versys Forum Drag Racing Forum Ducati 899 Panigale Forum
Suzuki V-Strom BMW K1600 Triumph Forum Victory Forums Sportbikes BMW NineT Forum
Volusia Forum BMW F800 Forum Triumph 675 Forum MV Agusta Forum HD Street Forum Suzuki GW250 Forum
Yamaha Motorcycles Victory Gunner Forum Honda Vultus Forum HD LiveWire Forum Ninja H2 Forum
R6-Forum.com is an independent Yamaha enthusiast website. Content on R6-Forum.com is generated by its users and R6-Forum.com is not in any way affiliated with Yamaha Motor Corporation, U.S.A.